Introducing #CREATEINME (creative me)

I tried to gather all my thoughts to write this post and to be honest; the weight on my heart and my jumbled thoughts had me all the way messed up.

There are times when it's difficult to look at my reflection in the mirror and just love myself. I point out all the wrong things about me to match the idea of of how I should look.

I remember last summer coming home after work and just crying to myself. I wasn't even sure what exactly got me all worked up. Maybe it was the fact that for about 9 years I've struggled to match up to the standard of what the world calls beauty, literally trying every form of acne treatment while receiving unsolicited advice from random strangers and family members who have no idea the internal struggle of self love I face on a daily basis. Or maybe my mind reminding me about all the negative things that people have said about me to feed into my insecurities. Or the fact that I was supposed to graduate on time and have my degree framed so I could look proudly at my accomplishment--but I'm 23 and I'm still working on my undergrad. There so many other reasons that could have made me sad that day. But I wasn't happy with my reality.

Somewhere in-between my jumbled thoughts, I had lost myself, and although I wanted better I really couldn't grab a hold of my truth.

I was talking to a friend today and she said something very interesting to me: she said no one wakes up wanting or wishing to be worse than they already are. You could be at the lowest point of your life but you will still want better for yourself.

So, why is it that we want better but better isn't always the thing we run to?

There is no exact answer to that question. Why? Because everyone’s idea of better is different.

I can only speak on my truth of what my better is.

And that is, to express myself through writing-- something that took me forever to figure out that I love immensely.

I realized that writing has always been a part of me; it's something that God created in me while I was in my mothers womb. 

For you created my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. | Psalms 139:13|

The verse became some much more apparent once I started understanding that every thing about our identity God created within us. He doesn’t miss a thing; our art is the expression of God’s handiwork.

I always had the idea that God had forgotten about me, and there was nothing special about me to embrace my better. I wrote in a previous post before that I envied others for their gifts because

1. I was so focused on others;

2. Sometimes churches tend to praise and uplift other gifts more. 
I really want to encourage those who may not necessarily use their talents and gifts in the 4 corners of the church or feel like they don't fit when it comes to finding a perfect ministry to utilize their talents and skills.

So I came up with this idea called CREATEinME. It’s a play on words for CREATIVE ME.

This year I'll be featuring people on my blog who inspire me in their creative process /gifts. Whether it's through writing, designing, music or any creative form, I want their creative style to be embraced and for them to really accept and believe that this is everything God made them out to be. They are not exempted.  

I just want to be clear: I still struggle every single day to feel my best or be at my best. But through God's Grace I'm embracing my better and hopefully I can help others embrace theirs too.

If you want to feature on my blog:

You can email me at nanaohhsakeoflove@gmail.com

for the sake of His love,
NanaOhh.