Focus

I've been developing a daily routine to stabilize and soak myself in the truth: that is, relying on God’s trust; His love, His promises and discipline over my life. It's not an easy thing to understand God love--as simple  as it is, our minds and hearts may not always perceive it as such. His promises for our life can sometimes overwhelm us because we sometimes choose to be impatient and run ahead of him --even though he has the blueprint of your life. God’s discipline hurts. His “no's” sometimes aren't the easiest to grasp. His “stop what you are doing”can really hit the nail on the head to get you to reposition yourself. 

I remember the very first time God spoke to me. It was in a dream, and although the voice of God was something I wasn't familiar with at the time, I knew he was trying to draw my attention to him. I didn't grow up in church. The idea of prayer wasn't instilled in me at a young age; in fact, the only thing I knew at the top of my head was the Hail Mary since I went to a Catholic school. So the idea of the love of God was distant from my memory and didn't make much sense to me.

I had reached a dark place in my life. Having sex with a man who didn't really want me. Smoking the pain away so I didn't have to deal with the reality. Sadness; I was trapped in a place of melancholy. So I prayed a prayer of escape to a God I had no relationship with. That night I had a dream where I met a friend-- who I was elated to see. In the dream, my friend had this message for me. She wanted me to know that God wanted me to: FOCUS!

FOCUS???? 

I woke up with my mind perplexed as ever. If God was speaking to me he had to say more than just focus.  At that time I wasn't sure what the dream meant, but as I started to reassess my life and situation. I recognized that focus was what I need to keep my life in check.  I'm a very passionate person, sometimes overly so. I tend to shift my energy to one thing and that one thing, when I'm not careful results being my main focus.

At the start of the year,  I was excited about accomplishing all my goals. Within the second week of January I could see that I was starting to overwhelm myself with my own plans and dreams. I was starting to hate the goals I had outlined for myself. And it was stressing me out. My purpose and vision was becoming diluted.

I was brainstorming with my boyfriend about my blog. I had finish venting to him about how the blogging world and connecting with other bloggers was stressing me out. I felt like I was losing myself and what my focus was just because I was so ecstatic to connect with others. In our conversation , I asked him what he would love to read on my blog. He replied: "I think you're losing focus on why you started this blog. You never had to write to cater to your audience, because you wrote to express yourself. You felt called to write this blog so you could voice your experiences and perspectives as a Christian in your own way. You feel that God has called you to do this so don't lose focus on why you're doing it. " . His response convicted me. And he was so right. Who was getting the glory? I had clearly X God out and stamped my face in the picture. My motives for blogging had completely switched up.  To reinforce this conviction, Avrielle showed me a tweet from Jackie Hill that really got me.

Hence, after I had realized this I asked God what he was teaching me in this season because clearly I was missing the point. He reminded me about the dream that he first gave me which was to FOCUS. So to help me focus I came up with up a few things that can keep me on track.

1) Intimacy with God.

2) Got a planner. I don't like to stick to rules or schedules. I really enjoying going with the flow. But I bought myself a planner so I can be be more organized, which will help me with my daily goals.

3) I decided to write love notes to myself. I often find myself comparing or envying what others have instead of FOCUSING on my growth and process. So to encourage myself I write quotes and positive messages to myself to keep myself FOCUSED.

And that is it. I’ve kept it short simply because I don't want to overwhelm myself with extra stuff which I probably won't do.

You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you. | Isaiah 23:3|

here is also a link to where I got my planner and note books 

You also get free shipping over 25 dollars.

for the sake of his love,

NanaOhh.